BPD Awareness Month Blog - Andrew's Lived Experience
May is Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) awareness month. BPD is a type of personality disorder. In this blog, Andrew (he/him; not his real name), a gay man in his 40s lliving in Manchester, shares his experience of being diagnosed with BPD.
I’ve had BPD for 10 years now. I’ve had some childhood trauma, involving sexual assault, which might add some more context. It was difficult to manage at first, but the diagnosis gave me some answers to unexplained behaviour, which might have otherwise been described as challenging, difficult, or confrontational.
There was also a period of substance misuse. I was wrongly under the impression that it would help, and of course it never helped. Before this time, I had no previous history of substance misuse, so I think that puts into context the distress that can arise from the experience of BPD. After periods of self-management tools, and interventions from CMHT, I learnt new ways to manage the diagnosis.
Looking back, I realised have made some wrong choices, however, looking forward I’ve come to realise a what I needed to do to help myself. I’ve now been an Approved Mental Health Professional (AMHP) for many years, and before that worked as a mental health social worker. I really enjoy what I do and I wouldn’t change it. I’m really passionate about mental health, and it impacts my life directly. Though I have my own physical health difficulties too, I think there is a lot more stigma around mental health, particularly around BPD. We still have some work to do, but the mental health systems have definitely improved around this.
If I was to give any advice to help yourself or a loved one, or even patient, it would be self-management. For example, having good sleep hygiene and getting enough sleep. I think about this meticulously, having strict bedtimes throughout the week. Having a good routine generally and having structure in your home and work life, is important too, like regular attendance at the gym. And I try and avoid anything caffeinated after 3pm.
As a person who works full-time in a senior role in a high-pressured job, it’s really important to have a good work-life balance as much as you can. And whilst it might be convenient and easy to work from home, that human interaction is critical, so I wouldn’t recommend fully working from home if you can. If you live alone, or are somewhat isolated in anyway, it’s important to go out for walk to the shop or post a letter. And my final tip, and the probably the most challenging for me to do, before you respond to that email/letter/voicemail/text: pause, think, reply.
You can find out more about BPD and learn more about people’s experience of BPD here: What is borderline personality disorder (BPD)? - Mind
You can find useful contacts here: Useful contacts - borderline personality disorder (BPD) - Mind
